Be who you are and say what you feel,
Because those who mind don’t matter
And those who matter don’t mind.- Dr. Seuss
Writing about other people is easy, they give you their story and you write it out, but writing your own story is difficult. Who am I? What am I doing in life?
I’ve been having difficulty with not letting some comments get to me. For some reason, I’m fighting with myself to keep someone’s comment away from where I will be in the end. I have to keep reminding myself that I’m on this journey for me and what they say is irrelevant. There’s this one comment that has been running through my mind ever since it was said. What I’m referring to is a comment that just stuck to me when I was attending my church class.
“If you support homosexuality, then you have a problem with God.” Being a Christian (no, not the social medias image) and being a part of the LGBT+ community, this really frustrates me. If I had “such an issue” with God, then why was I there?
Now, before I get some sort of comment, I will say that the reason I was there was because of my faith in God. God has helped me in so many ways that seem impossible without him, but that’s another story.
We are born with our sexual orientation, we do not choose it. One day there was a guy who walked up to me and my friend and said “Gay people choose to be that way. It’s disgusting.” Our response: “Choose to be gay, right now.” “I can’t.” “Why not?” “I just can’t.” “Exactly.” The community has been dealing with this stigma for FOREVER and no matter how much scientific evidence there is that prove that we are born with our sexual orientation, some people deny it.
Now, I also believe that God makes everyone. I believe that everything started with God and all that good stuff. My boyfriend, who has gone to Church his whole life, asks me tons of questions and all I can say to sum it up is that “if God makes everyone, yet is against homosexuality, why did he make non-straight people?”
Before I get the whole “If a man lies with another man…” Line, let me just say that you’re missing part of the story, and you can’t mold it to what you want. The situation with Sodom and Gamorrah is that they were being sexually explicit, murdering people, and going against everything he told them to do. This included orgies with the same sex. This pissed him off, but from what I know is that it wasn’t the gay-ness that pissed him off, it was the fact that they were ignoring him and having sex with everyone and destroying the city. (If you have sex with tons of people, you do you boo-boo, I’m not one to judge your life.)
“Why don’t you ask them about it then?” Because with the way my church is, the majority of the people in there will either say I’m “in a phase” or that I chose to be the way I am. In only out to two people in that church, and that consists of my boyfriend and his mom.
“Why are you still going to that church then?” Because I still have faith in God and hearing His word is very important to me. Everything else just makes sense to me. Mind you, I was never this way. I used to be an atheist, but then I would find myself praying that things would work out at that time. So, when I started dating my boyfriend he invited me to church. He wasn’t trying to convert me or “save me,” he wanted to see how I would feel about it (and there was Thanksgiving potluck afterwards. So of course I went. I love food, duh.) At first I was constantly mentally rolling my eyes at everything that was said, I was only there to spend time with my boyfriend and eat food, but the more I went, the more intrigued I became and the more things started clicking in my brain. They’re all friendly people and I love being around them, it’s just there are some things we don’t agree on, but nobody except my boyfriend knows that.
So, the point here is: stay true to you, even when everyone else is fighting against you. I love being who I am and I love God, so I’m not going to let one comment control how I live my life. At my church they urge you to go into the Bible and study, make sure that what they’re saying is right, so I do. I go in and do my own research. I’ve yet to say anything because I know that with my lack of knowledge they’d just try and tear me down. So I’ll live in my Truth and continue to walk my own path.
Thank you for reading. As always,
Be the baddest bitch you can be.